The truth about Sado-Masochism
Someone recently told me that Sado-Masochism is a “world of secrecy”, as if this was a powerful secreft society working on some obscure goal. It is not. It is just an entertainment playground with codes and costumes which aim to sexual liberation. A French magazine recently wrote that People are fascinated with Marquis de Sade. Big lie, I bet that 90% of Sado-Masochism or Domination Players do not give a thought to this man. If they are trying to create a new idol in the French culture, they must look further. And as a matter of fact, the day that someone starts to advertise that Sado-Masochism started erronously in the Aristocracy, it might lose many adepts. By the way Marquis de Sade was so afraid of his wife that
he had to beg her to bring him tea in jail in 4 long letters. I read some of them, and linking to them will just be a bit depressing! Funny that they are today protected by copyright, while this man’s writings were a ticket to mental institutions once upon a time.
What is the level of public, advertised, glorified S and M?
Basically, nothing. Let me start first with explaining the behaviour of born Sadistic men or women. None of these born Sadistic man or woman has a public site, flattering his penchant for pain. The majority of Sadistic people are generally in denial, another part is in jail or mental institution (For example this man who was killing Gays and eating them out his refrigerator, the couple who kidnapped E. Smart for example or more recently this incestuous Father in Australia, but these are the extreme ones) and the rest of them is hunting in the Vanilla world. NEVER advertising sadism is the main part of being a Sadist. A very small percentage of Sadists seek therapeutic help…ashamed or plagued by remorse. But they are part of another category of Real Sadistic, the spiritually intelligent one or genious Sadistic. This last category have the advantage of mastering his sex life thanks to his spiritual quest or values learned at home, you will never find them in jail, forums, myspace, searching for a Partner. Any Sadist trait is that he must keep bound to him or her the physical presence of his partner. This intelligent Sadist, a minority, has a very kinky sexual or fantasy life. But he WANTs to hide it well; and he can. The thought of being listed with notorious Criminals is one of the factors that will force them to hide, even if they will not be able to hurt someone their whole life.
What about SM sites, submissives, coarse words, cruel images?
They are just expressions of adult fantasies. What actually teases public SM Players (This is how I will refer to OVERT SM Playera and Seekers) is the whole process of communicating in a certain way, doing things that changes the energy of power in their mind, wearing costumes, dungeons, internet use or easy-to-get use, naked images and the forbidden or taboo side of their games. Is this legendary feeling of power fake? Yes and No. Beating up a man or woman who is already submissive, masochist and asking for it, is not power, it might be labour. The majority of Sadistic player, a good 70 percent, usually has never experienced self-esteem at home or has been abused. The remaining part just like it as adult recreational activities.
But having pleasure because of pain exist only for public Sadistic people who are physically masochist. The pleasure that
public Sado Masochism glorify in site comes, after my studies, from the lack of disgust or fear when inflicting pain. Aside, like in sexuality, which is actually invented for healing and family building purposes, many Sadistic Players have
emotional problems that they want to lose, loving pain is truly a paradox. The well celebrated feeling of power is actually an illusion that lasts a determined time. Power is never connected to domination or submission, and if it had to be forcibly connected to any of them, it will be submission; The GRAIN of Power felt is truly physical, because if it was real, people in SM will be ruling the world and making it a better place, most of them cannot even dominate themselves to read this with open mind. There are so many SM Players because Sado-Masochism is the one of the oldest forms of confession and purification, rooting in the Catholic Church. Marquis de Sade did not invent it, he paganised it, whilst stunningly bored in jail. Once again, De Sade was a prince charming to his Lady all his life.
Again, It is not the PRESENCE of pain that excites the public Sadistic, it is ABSENCE of disgust and fear when hurting, that gives him or her the feeling of excitation and an illusion of strength.
What about the masochist or submissive one?
The real submissive and masochist lives also truly in denial, but he will settle preferably with a dominant partner. Public or conscious masochism is as easy as ABC. In less than 2 hours, a good Sadistic Player or Master can reverse your body, actually brain, to feel pleasure in case of pain, period. And if you do not reverse this before 2 weeks to 60
days, your body will keep getting a pleasure stimulus in case of pain. Which brings me to another SM myth, Real Sadistic folks do not operate their bodies to change gender as this is a sure mark of auto-mutilation, auto-submission to them. There is no such thing as Tranny Domme. Do not be that stupid, this is a obvious desperate gesture to get money. But if you look very
well, many SM sites have old photoshoped Trans screaming women supremacy! Who never read the oxy-moron statement FEMALE DOMINATION BY A MISTRESS? A man wantint to be feminine or sissifyed, at the other token, is truly a woman’s worshipper.
Where are Real Sadistic folks then, except from jails or hospitals?
You can find them in all fields of the society. Real Sadistic one can be Criminal, Business Man or Woman, Therapist,
Entertainer, Politician, Preacher or just a clean looking man with a solid family image. Real Sado go after non-consenting folks and some of them truly ask for therapeutic help. The small time mental Sadist treatment that people get from
racists for example, is more frequent but can also more destructive. Guess what? You can get it from a Post Office Clerk!
The public Submissive looking for pleasures in sites and forums will not even attract the attention of a real Sadistic man or woman. Sadistic will find this kind of submissive one repulsive without even being able to explain why most of the times! Slightly aware Sadistic folks are usually attracted to submissives in denial and strangely enough their couples usually stay together longer than the conventional one!
You must ask me this: Can good Real SM people be good partners, because of what I said previously?
Yes and they will not leave you for a small disagreement. If a playing Dominant woman wants to be happy, she actually has to find her obedient real submitting man and train him; the good news is that they are everywhere if you know how to read the signs and…yes they truly are yummy! Real submissive run to open your door, kneels quicky when you drop something 3 times without complaining and most importantly, try to anticipate how to please you before you say a word, but the most charming thing is that they do not realize anything about their submission! NO ONE CAN FAKE TRUE SUBMISSION BECAUSE IT IS FIRST OF ALL, A BEHAVIOUR MOTIVATED FROM A VERY GENTLE, CARING HEART and not from leather hoods, whips and cuffs.
I am sure that some of you, by the way, met, at least, one man or woman who went from being assertive to submissive after falling in love. And if you don’t, you have not lived. He was submissive all the time, but had not found his Dominant woman yet! Another point is this: it is common knowledge, that public submissive men look for a Domina to dominate them after manipulation when they are bored with vanilla or just rejected. It does not take a Scientist to figure out that it is truly the Submissive who dominates in public Sado-Masochism, in the sense that he is getting the best part, what he wants.
Why are people stating that they are sadistic, masochist, submissive or dominants then?
Many Dommes work for one single Webmaster. Some of these Dommes have literally be found on the street. A few junkies are also stuck in this profession. But this is not my work to criticize, judge or even think about giving names that one of these Webmasters gave me. Some of their sites are in
Being SM player can ruin your life, it will do it progressively. But SM has SOME advantages that are acceptable and other that are to be reported to the Authorities. A good part of is dangerous and has the scum of the Earth, as it is the only erotic place where people can wear masks; Some of this usually fake advantages are,
- Money. It is legal work.
- It gives the impression of being accepted in a group
- The Scene offers sexual release, I am not saying sexual intercourse. All these people in SM pretend in forums not to like porn. That is true sometimes, only after being tired of porn or rejection. They switch to Dominants or submissives, especially when it is free. The risky part is what makes it interesting. The risk gives the impression that something is truly happening in
their lives
-It it the place to be for those who are trying to recruit new gays or just gays
who are tired of gays
- It gives illusions, exaggerated illusions becomes addictive and playing SM is a place to escape from reality or hidden heavy culpability
- In some countries, I will not name, it is the ONLY most paying job that someone waiting for a work permit can practise because of its secrecy
- It is a Paradise for illegal photos. The proof is that the standard sentence on a slave application says, I am not into c… but I would not mind if you Mistress wants that. YUK. I reject these subs because they protect criminals like
Garatino or this father in Austria. And if you Mistress have been with a Submissive Player who does not want you suddenly, it might be that he is around for c…porn business but he has been using you to cover up his business. Good riddance, his standards letters are exhausted for you he is already lying to another Mistress. Please do not be ashamed to report anything
illegal of you have one proof.
All these men who are crying for real Sadistic women are not even real submissive in the first place. A real submissive knows how to find his dominant woman and to keep her, I will hang up the phone to the someone who insists on high level of Sadism, because such a man behaves actually like a stupid dominant zombie. He considers women inferior creature who must do anything to please him. It is still a very good thing to find a woman who agrees to spank a butt.
CONCLUSION
If you think at it well, fake Sadistic or submissive Players can have a lot of fun. SM, Dominants and submissives Players are in touch with their bodies desires and fantasy, if they are reasonably considerate, respectful and faitfhfull.
This kind of blog, will make some of them scream that they are true, right they are true Players.
If you find out that your Brother is in Fake SM, do not worry BUT try to communicate him about the destructive path of SM when you feel that the time is right. Fake SM, at least, makes vanilla taste fantastic ever after or the day your family member get bored by faking SM. If it is Real Sado-Masochism, as long as, he does not do anything illegal or dangerous do not worry for him. The Sex Addict is a form of auto-submission or auto-domination; they are sex slaves. You do not date your Brother, so relax.
Lady Lara Victore, Mistress and Therapist
Alexa.com, a subsidiary of Amazon.com is a site providing ranking information on traffic levels for websites. The Alexa rank is measured according to the amount of users who have visited a website with the Alexa toolbar installed. Contrary to the popular belief that Alexa ranking determines the ranking of a site on the net, the Alexa rank is measured according to the amount of users who have visited a website with the Alexa toolbar installed.
Consequently, this is how the Alexa ranking basically goes, I can have 100.000 visitors a month, but if none of them has an Alexa Toolbar on his PC, my site ranking will deteriorate. What about comparing sites ranking? Useless, some webmasters can manipulate these stats thanks to a script, different IP’s or truly dishonest practises, google it by yourself, if you want. If you want to help your site and mine, you must install the Alexa Toolbar. It time travels the net to give you a early look of sites, gives you the most clicked subjects online and it has a facebook and twitter log-in button. Peek the Alexa Toolbar.
Why would you want to increase your Alexa rank?
Webmasters, advertisers and ad networks use your Alexa rank as a gauge to determine the worth of a link on your website. If you depend on link or site selling as a form of monetization you’ll definitely want to increase your Alexa rank, because it’ll increase your bargaining power when it comes to ad pricing. Unfortunately at the writing of this story, Alexa is curiously the only ranking system on the net now. I will say that if you go to the bottom of it, big money must be involved, otherwise why would they take the trouble of offering a tricky ranking and monopolize this activity, but this is another story. Amazon, The Alexa Ranking Parent is a big company who would like to know your spending habits, do not blame it, you are already on a spending habit watch list, by social sites or browsers, either you want it or not.
Methods and strategies you can use to increase your Alexa Rank dramatically in the short and long run.
Most of these tips are derived from several webmasters who claimed to have derived positive results through their experiments with the Alexa Rankings.Do these tips work? According to some, yes they definitely do work. But do note that most of them require active effort of some sort and hence, they will work as long as long as you are consistently performing specific actions.To increase your Alexa rank in the long run, it is highly recommended that one focus on developing quality content which attracts and maintains a large audience instead of purely focusing on artificially increasing your Alexa Rank. Great link-worthy content will leads to an natural increase in site traffic and is an excellent way to passively increase your Alexa rank. I disagree with this, somewhat. Many sites having one page information are above the 1. 000.000.

1. Install the Alexa toolbar or Firefox’s SearchStatus extension and set your site as your homepage. This is the most basic step.2. Put up an Alexa rank widget on your website. According to some, each click counts as a visit even if the toolbar is not used by the visitor.3. Encourage others to use the Alexa toolbar. Be sure to link to Alexa’s full explanation of their toolbar and tracking system so your readers know what installing the toolbar or extension entails.4. Work in an Office or own a company? Get the Alexa toolbar or SS Firefox extension installed on all computers and set your website as the homepage for all browsers. This may work only when dynamic or different IPs are used.5. Get friends to review and rate your Alexa website profile. Not entirely sure of its impact on rankings but it might help in some way.6. Write or Blog about Alexa. Webmaster and bloggers love to hear about ways to increase their Alexa rank. They’ll link to you and send you targeted traffic (i.e. visitors with the toolbar already installed). This gradually has effects on your Alexa ranking.7. Flaunt your URL in webmaster forums. Webmasters usually have the toolbar installed. You’ll get webmasters to visit your website and offer useful feedback. It’s also a good way to give back to the community if you have useful articles to share with others.8. Write content that is related to webmasters. This can fall in the category of domaining and SEO, two fields in which most webmasters will have the Alexa toolbar installed. Promote your content on social networking websites and webmaster forums.10 Create a webmaster tools section on your website. This is a magnet for webmasters who will often revisit your website to gain access to the tools. Aaron Wall’s webpage on SEOTools is a very good example.There are 10 other ways. But if the above-mentioned ones does not work, despite your efforts, I will suggest, you quit worrying about your site ranking forever. It is possible that you find just one way that works for you on this Page and in the long run. Good luck. _______________________
Related Article
Webmaster’s Problems with the Alexa Rank
Alexa ranking is heavily skewed towards websites which have a large webmaster/tech audience. This is because webmasters or web savvy audiences are much more likely to have the Alexa toolbar installed than websites whose visitors are unaware of Alexa.As such, many have indicated that Alexa is a vastly inaccurate method of measuring a website’s reach, traffic and potential. I don’t disagree. Alexa is a silly way to measure web traffic but unfortunately, in an imperfect world Alexa is still heavily used by webmasters and ad networks when measuring the value of advertising on your website.Even if you are not concerned with the utility and value of Alexa but it is perceived importance in the eyes of potential advertisers.
Information Source, www.doshdosh.com and other sites on the net
Do you have a problem concerning LIFE, LOVE, EROTICISM, DOMINATION, ADDICTION?
I will give you a free First Consultation, if
1. Send your letter to queenlaraparis@yahoo.com OR call met at 3345798529
All other consultations will be billed by paypal.
I am here for you.
Do not wait until it gets worse.
Do not lose courage, contact me today.
Total Discretion offered.
Merry Christmas to all and Blessed 2010
Black Queen Lara
Paris London
Restricted Sites. Please, do not enter if you are not 21 nor interested in fetish photos.
Ne visitez pas ces sites si vous n’avez pas 21 OU si vous n’aimez pas les scènes fétiches;
Deze sites niet betreden als u niet 21 jaar oud bent of als u niet in fetish fotos geintereseerd ben.
LaraVictore
Star Paris
Peace on Earth to All the Men and Woman of Good Will
House Democrats reached agreement Wednesday on key elements of a health care bill that would vastly alter America’s medical landscape, requiring virtually universal sign-ups and establishing a new government-run insurance option for millions.
House Speaker Nancy Pelosi planned a formal announcement Thursday morning in front of the Capitol. Lawmakers said the legislation could be up for a vote on the House floor next week.
The rollout will cap months of arduous negotiations to bridge differences between liberal and moderate Democrats and blend health care overhaul bills passed by three separate committees over the summer. The developments in the House came as Senate Majority Leader Harry Reid, D-Nev., tried to round up support among moderate Democrats for his bill, which includes a modified government insurance option that states could opt out of.
Reid met Wednesday with Arkansas Sen. Blanche Lincoln, who faces a potentially tough re-election next year.
The final product in the House, reflecting many of President Barack Obama’s priorities, includes new requirements for employers to offer insurance to their workers or face penalties, fines on Americans who don’t purchase coverage and subsidies to help lower-income people do so. Insurance companies would face new prohibitions against charging much more to older people or denying coverage to people with health conditions.
Pelosi has also said the bill would strip the health insurance industry of a long-standing exemption from antitrust laws covering market allocation, price fixing and bid rigging.
The price tag, topping $1 trillion over 10 years, would be paid for by taxing high-income people and cutting some $500 billion in payments to Medicare providers. The legislation would extend health coverage to around 95 percent of Americans.
Republicans criticized the bill even before it was unveiled.
“Americans’ health care is too important to risk on one gigantic bill that was negotiated behind closed doors,” said Rep. Dave Camp, R-Mich. “The Medicare cuts will hurt seniors, the tax increases will kill jobs and the government takeover of health care will increase premium costs.”
One change expected to be revealed Thursday is that some of the provisions of the bill, which were set to take effect mostly in 2013, have been moved up so Americans would see the benefits of the legislation more quickly, according to Pelosi spokesman Nadeam Elshami.
“I’m pretty confident that we’ve got the right pieces in place,” said Rep. George Miller, D-Calif., chairman of the Education and Labor Committee, one of the three panels involved in writing the bill. “We can quibble over parts of it, but the fact is when you’re taking a 60-year-old system that grew up in a rather haphazard fashion and you’re trying to bring some coherence to it, these are sort of the things you have to do at the beginning of that process.”
Plenty of work remains to be done before a bill could land on Obama’s desk – and there’s still no guarantee that Congress can complete the legislation before year’s end, as the president wants. If Obama does sign a health overhaul bill, he will have bucked decades of failed attempts by past administrations, most recently by former President Bill Clinton in the 1990s.
House leaders hope to finish the bill before Veteran’s Day, Nov. 11. The Senate is aiming to start debate sometime in the next several weeks.
Bills passed by the House and Senate would have to be merged before a final product could be sent to Obama, and there are a number of differences between the two chambers that would have to be reconciled. Among them are the different approaches to the public plan. The House does not include the opt-out provision for states, and it has more stringent requirements for employers. The Senate would use a tax on high-value insurance plans to pay for the bill, an approach that the House version doesn’t have.
In the end, Pelosi, D-Calif., and other House leaders were unable to round up the necessary votes for their preferred version of the government insurance plan – one that would base payment rates to providers on rates paid by Medicare. Instead, the Health and Human Services secretary would negotiate rates with providers, the approach preferred by moderates and the one that will be featured in the Senate’s version.
That marked a defeat for liberal lawmakers, who argued for months that a public insurance plan tied to Medicare would save more money for the government, and offer cheaper rates to consumers. Moderates feared that doctors, hospitals and other providers, particularly those in rural states, would be hurt, and in the end they looked poised to prevail, despite constituting a distinct minority in the 256-member House Democratic caucus.
Some liberals were prepared to accept the negotiated rate structure. Others were still withholding support, even while pointing to Reid’s inclusion of a government insurance plan in the Senate bill as a victory in itself.
“We were laughed at in August. Who would have thought that the Senate bill would have a public option?” said Rep. Lynn Woolsey, D-Calif., a co-chair of the Congressional Progressive Caucus.
Woolsey was noncommittal about whether progressives would accept the negotiated rates. “This is not walkaway time and it is not acceptance time,” Woolsey said.
Members of the progressive caucus, along with lawmakers from the black, Hispanic and Asian-Pacific American caucuses, were scheduled to meet with Obama at the White House on Thursday, she said.
The legislation would set up a new purchasing exchange where small businesses and individuals without affordable health care options could shop for and compare insurance plans. The new public plan would be one offered in the exchange, and it would be optional; an analysis by the Congressional Budget Office of early versions of the bill said that the public plan would be expected to cover 9 million to 10 million people by 2019.
The House plan also envisions a significant expansion of Medicaid, the federal-state health care program for low income people.
Democratic leaders still faced disputes over prohibiting taxpayer money for abortions and health care for illegal immigrants, issues they hoped to resolve after the bill’s unveiling.
I have my own social network which will grow as it goes
As I would like to have mature discussions without having to censor my words, I insist only folks over 18 years of age are admitted at the condition that you are Major legally and not offended by free speech.
I will be on it very often, so subscribe and have fun
My Flash Book
I am updating it later today.
Have a great day or night
Obama wins 2009 Nobel Peace Prize
This is my comment on Lady Michelle Obama’s Page, 4 days ago,
Oct 5 2009 12:40 PM
Bonjour My First Lady.
My Higher Self finally found me.
I wish you a lot of unexpected happiness.
Kiss from Paris
Black Queen Lara
I AM BEYOND JOY AND CRYING FOR HAPPINESS TODAY, because President Obama has gotten his First Nobel Prize, whilst I thought I was the only ONE noticing something exceptional about Barack Obama: President Obama is holding his promises at all levelS, like no one has ever done in my life time. The work needs more time, but THE WHOLE WORLD HAS TO RESPECT HIM FOR WHAT HE IS DOING AND AMERICANS HELP HIM THE BEST THEY CAN.
Photobucket
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Obama wins 2009 Nobel Peace Prize
The Nobel committee said they wanted to support Mr Obama’s approach
US President Barack Obama has been awarded the 2009 Nobel Peace Prize.
The Nobel Committee said he won it for “his extraordinary efforts to strengthen international diplomacy and co-operation between peoples”.
The committee highlighted Mr Obama’s efforts to support international bodies and promote nuclear disarmament.
Mr Obama – woken up with the news early on Friday – said in an address at the White House that he was “surprised and deeply humbled” by the award.
He said he did not feel he deserved to be in the company of some of the “transformative figures” who had previously received the award.
Speaking outside the White House, he said he would accept the prize as a “call to action”.
There were a record 205 nominations for this year’s peace prize. Zimbabwean Prime Minister Morgan Tsvangirai and Chinese dissident Hu Jia had been among the favourites.
Instead the committee chose Mr Obama, who was inaugurated less than two weeks before the 1 February nomination deadline.
There was widespread surprise at the committee’s decision. While world leaders were largely supportive of the award, thousands of people have contacted the BBC with more sceptical views.
An estimated 75% of comment sent to the BBC expressed surprise at the award. Some said awarding the prize to Mr Obama was plain wrong, others that the decision had come too soon, before he had made any concrete foreign policy achievement.
ANALYSIS
Paul Reynolds
Paul Reynolds
BBC News, London
The award is certainly unexpected and might be regarded as more of an encouragement for intentions than a reward for achievements.
After all, the president has been in office for a little over eight months and he might hope to serve eight years. His ambition for a world free of nuclear weapons is one that is easier to declare than to achieve and a climate control agreement has yet to be reached.
Indeed, the citation indicates that it is President Obama’s world view that attracted the Nobel committee – that diplomacy should be founded “on the basis of values and attitudes that are shared by the majority of the world’s population”.
Obama rewarded for world view
The Nobel laureate – chosen by a five-member committee – wins a gold medal, a diploma and 10m Swedish kronor ($1.4m).
“Only very rarely has a person to the same extent as Obama captured the world’s attention and given its people hope for a better future,” the Norwegian committee said in a statement.
“His diplomacy is founded in the concept that those who are to lead the world must do so on the basis of values and attitudes that are shared by the majority of the world’s population.”
Asked why the prize had been awarded to Mr Obama less than a year after he took office, Nobel Committee head Thorbjoern Jagland said: “It was because we would like to support what he is trying to achieve”.
“It is a clear signal that we want to advocate the same as he has done,” he said.
He specifically mentioned Mr Obama’s work to strengthen international institutions and work towards a world free of nuclear arms.
‘New climate’
Reaction to the committee’s decision from around the world was swift and varied.
MARDELL’S AMERICA
There was already a huge weight of responsibility on Obama’s shoulders, and this medal hung round his neck has just made it a little heavier
Mark Mardell
BBC North America editor
Read Mark’s thoughts in full
Mohamed ElBaradei, the head of the UN’s nuclear watchdog, the IAEA, said he could not think of anyone more deserving of the award.
“In less than a year in office, he has transformed the way we look at ourselves and the world we live in and rekindled hope for a world at peace with itself,” Mr ElBaradei said.
At the other end of the spectrum, Taliban spokesman Zabihullah Mujahid told the Reuters news agency the award was ridiculous.
“The Nobel prize for peace? Obama should have won the ‘Nobel Prize for escalating violence and killing civilians’,” he said.
Since taking office in January, President Obama has pursued an ambitious international agenda including a push for peace in the Middle East and negotiations over Iran’s nuclear programme.
THE SELECTION PROCESS
Those qualified to nominate candidates include members of national governments, international judiciary, academics and previous prize winners
Five Norwegians are chosen by Norway’s parliament to sit on the Nobel Committee
The committee compiles a shortlist of between five and 20 candidates
The shortlist is considered by the Nobel Institute’s permanent advisers, mainly Norwegian academics
The Nobel Committee chooses the winner
Details of the nominations and selection process are kept secret for 50 years
World reacts to Obama peace prize
Profile: Barack Obama
But critics say he has failed to make breakthroughs. Domestically, Mr Obama has been working to tackle an economic crisis and win support for healthcare reform.
Some said they saw the prize as a way of encouraging the US leader early in his presidency.
“It is an award that speaks to the promise of President Obama’s message of hope,” said Archbishop Desmond Tutu of South Africa, a former winner.
French President Nicolas Sarkozy said the award confirmed “America’s return to the hearts of the people of the world”.
The statement from the Nobel Committee said Mr Obama had “created a new climate in international politics”.
“Multilateral diplomacy has regained a central position, with emphasis on the role that the United Nations and other international institutions can play,” it said.
The committee added that the US was now playing a more constructive role in meeting “the great climatic challenges” facing the world, and that democracy and human rights would be strengthened.
Mr Obama is the first US president to win the prize since former US President Jimmy Carter in 2002. Former vice-president Al Gore shared the prize in 2007.
Richard, United States
Among earlier US leaders, Theodore Roosevelt won the prize in 1906 and Woodrow Wilson won it in 1919.
The Nobel prize was invented by the Swedish industrialist and inventor of dynamite Alfred Nobel, and was first awarded in 1901.
He designated the parliament in Norway, which at the time was united with Sweden, to elect the peace prize committee. Swedish academies are responsible for other prizes.
The prize-giving ceremony for the peace award is due to take place on 10 December in the Norwegian capital, Oslo.
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Have a great weekend, be safe and sweet
Black Queen Lara
My Doll is a bit too skinny, but it is always fun to watch this video gift!
Order your own gift.
If you’re wondering whether you or your partner is addicted to sex (or sexual kicks obtained through using pornography) we first need to be clear that a real sex addict isn’t just someone with a high sex drive who enjoys making love a lot with their partner.
If you’re always pestering to make love and your partner is always feeling pressured and muttering that you’re a sex maniac, your problem is one of differing sex drives.
This is a very common problem and I can help you with that if you drop me a line.
But a sex addict’s problems are really quite different.
A sex addict (or sexaholic) uses sex like a drug.
Just as alcoholics use booze to blot out bad feelings and give themselves a high, a sexaholic uses the excitement and stimulation of sex for short-term thrills.
The trouble is that the true sex addict doesn’t just go for the thrills occasionally.
Sex addiction, like drug addiction or alcoholism, gets progressively worse.
At first it fits into your life and you can handle it.
You may just be more likely than the average as a youngster to get off with someone you don’t know on a Saturday night.
Then there comes a point where it gets out of control.
It may be causing other problems in your life – ruining a steady relationship, for example – but you just can’t stop.
Eventually all of life can become a search for the next fix, work can suffer, proper relationships are utterly impossible, and compulsive promiscuity of course risks sexual health.
Why do some people get addicted to sex like this?
Generally it is because they had a pretty bleak childhood which has left them feeling miserable inside and with lots of black feelings they want to escape.
Many sex addicts were sexually or emotionally abused as children.
What they really need is someone to love, rather than just sex, but their problems get in the way of their developing and maintaining lasting, loving relationships.
Women as well as men can be sex addicts and may end up branded as slags.
They are usually conscious of wanting more than one-night stands and wonder why men always seem to want them for one thing only and why their relationships never last.
The answer is that sex-addict women tend to give out all the wrong signals. They give men the impression that a one-night stand is what they expect.
Sex-addict men may not realise they have a problem when they are younger, because they just see themselves as players, sowing their wild oats.
The problem shows up when they are trying to settle down and may well have children.
They are persistently unfaithful because they are addicted to the thrill of anonymous sex, even if they have a willing partner at home.
In fact, because an important part of their problem is that they cannot develop close relationships, they use their persistent infidelity as a way of distancing even the most loving of partners.
These days I am also hearing from more and more couples and individuals troubled by addiction to internet sex and pornography.
Usually it is the man who is finding himself drawn to trawl the internet for hours every day for sexual thrills.
He can end up so cut off from his emotional and sexual responses that it takes harder and harder material to stir a reaction, and he loses interest in normal sex even when he has a loving and willing partner feeling desperately rejected.
In this case, his partner has to be clear that it is not that she is unattractive or undesirable.
It is his problem – he needs help to get in touch with his own emotions and sexuality.
If it’s your own addiction to sex which is worrying you, what you most urgently need is help to recover from all the old hurt which you long to escape.
It’s by dealing with those buried feelings that you will start to be able to wean yourself off damaging addictive sex.
In UK, you could make an appointment to see a Relate counsellor (www.relate.org.uk). You can also find a sex therapist near you through the British Association For Sexual and Relationship Therapy
(www.basrt.org.uk).
Your problem may have started from a whole variety of causes, though, and there is a whole variety of sources of help I can put you in touch with.
You can also contact Sex Addicts Anonymous (0845 519 0058, www.saa-recovery.org).
They hold meetings around the country.
Women who call can ask to speak to another woman and there are some men-only meetings.
There are also practical steps you can take yourself, now, to try to break the sexaholic habit.
Because you use sex as a way of dealing with stress, learning deep relaxation techniques can help you calm down and so feel more able to say no when you know you should.
You can buy books on relaxation or I can send you details.
Look back over the past few times you’ve had sex that you later regretted and think what was the trigger.
If it’s drinking too much, then work on cutting down the booze – I can help with that too.
If it’s when you’ve been especially low and lonely, work out a plan of action in advance for the next time you feel that way.
Arrange to phone a friend when you’re feeling down, organise an outing or treat that doesn’t expose you to temptation.
Or you could call Sex Addicts Anonymous, mentioned earlier.
If your problem is addiction to internet sex or pornography, you need to take some practical measures too.
It’s comparatively straight-forward to avoid sex shops, buying magazines and DVDs.
Home computer use is more tricky because so many of us need it for our work these days,
But you can agree sensible time limits for being on the internet, and move the computer into a shared area of the home.
There are special downloadable filter software programmes to block pornography on your PC.
Check out www.brightfilter.co.uk (0333 7000 007).
If you have partner, tell them you think you have a problem with sex addiction.
They may find it reassuring to think that it’s not that you want to hurt them so much as that you’re a sex addict.
However, remember that there’s nothing they can do to sort out your problem for you.
And that’s what I want to remind you if you’re worried your partner may be a sex addict.
I can help you understand but he or she is the only one who can break that addiction.
If they won’t try, then probably your best course of action will be to leave them.
Sex addicts, I’m afraid, eventually wreck their partner’s and children’s lives along with their own.
I hope this has helped you understand how to cope with your worry.
I do realise how serious it can be so please do organise some help as soon as possible.
By D.










